


Home

by matthewwrites



Category: Starfighter (Comic)
Genre: Broken Heart, Depressing, M/M, Sad Ending, Spoilers, project thebes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-21
Updated: 2018-02-21
Packaged: 2019-03-22 00:57:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13752882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/matthewwrites/pseuds/matthewwrites
Summary: Abel returning home after Project Thebes.





	Home

**Author's Note:**

> I got sad and wanted to write some quick angst, enjoy. :,(

The ride back from space was elongated; almost as if those few hours were centuries long, while undeniable pain grew in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't speak, not a single word left my lips as I stepped off the spacecraft that had carried me home. Although, this didn't feel like home at all; this sinking feeling in my heart hurt worse than heartbreak. I am troubled, to say the least, as these thoughts have been crossing my mind ever since  _it_ had happened. It was cold, the goosebumps on my arms didn't seem to disappear as it was winter and snow had covered the ground.

 

Thankfully, the ride home was quick, but certainly not painless. Thoughts continued racing through my head and it felt as if someone had wrapped their fist around my heart; squeezing it with all their might.  _Project Thebes._ Out of the entire time, from the days ago that I had found out, until now, my heart had been pounding in my chest. Fighting Colterons next to you, you making my heart race with every loving touch, your protectiveness, our love-making: up until then, I thought they had all meant something to you. Nevertheless, I had been just a navigator in your eyes. Just another navigator. 

 

I had thought that this scar; the one that I bear on my lip, represented that I was yours and you were mine, but perhaps not. I was just a use to you and the rest of the Alliance. Nothing more. My heart broke at the thought. It was hard, just hearing you say those words and it was all I needed to break down. How could I have been so stupid?

 

 

_"So, then it was all just an act? Me loving you, you loving me. It was all bullshit?"_

 

_" No, Abel, it wasn-"_

 

_""My name isn't Abel. That is a taskname, a name that was given to me by people who wanted to hurt me." Tears streamed down my cheeks._

 

_"Ethan, it wasn't an ac-"_

 

_"Why should I believe you? You fooled me once, you won't fool me again."_

 

My eyes burned, as I remember him pleading me. Pleading me to stay with him and that it  _wasn't_ just an act and that he  _did_ love me. I remember brushing his long strands of hair behind his ears, revealing his tear-stained face. My heart pumped burning hot blood through my veins, enough to set coals on fire. 

 

_"Alex, you hurt me and I'll never forgive you for it."_

 

Project Thebes had failed; I didn't even go on the mission, my heart was too broken to bear even looking in the eyes of a fighter that I had fallen in love with, but didn't love me back. It made me question why I hated going home so much now. It made me realize that as soon as I stepped into that achromatic house, with welcoming parents, warmth, and fresh air, that,  _this wasn't home._

 

Home was when I was on that spacecraft, being held in Alexei's arms after a long, gentle, session of love-making. Home was when I was navigating with that beautiful man, that sat right behind me with that large smile upon his cheeks, telling me that we could do this. Home was when we sat behind the crates in the cargo room, drinking; talking about life on Mars and Earth. Home was him. Home was that amazing man with the harmful heart. 

 

As soon as I had reached my old room, I sat down at my desk. Alex was no longer part of the Alliance after a third failed mission, but I pulled out those papers I had retrieved from the office anyways. Closing my eyes, I breathed out heavily before leaning over the papers. Pulling my pen from my desk drawer, I signed the first paper, reading the top to myself. 

 

 _ **Permanent Navigator Requirements**_  


End file.
